It is hard to believe how much has happened since I last blogged, but I'll put forth a bit of effort at covering the important things.
The last week with Isaac and Kendra was lovely, of course. I put off thinking about my departure for as long as possible, because I so very disliked the idea of leaving.
My last Sunday at Stone Gate (Isaac and Kendra's church) was wonderful. The teaching is so solid. It was a feast for my soul. :) After church a girl (Krista) walked up to me (I think I'd met her before, but I was meeting so many people that I'm afraid I forgot a lot) and invited me to join the singles home group that evening. I thought I might as well, so that evening I headed out to find the place of meeting. I listened to a Tim Keller sermon on the way out, and in the sermon Keller talked about sin as "finding our identity in anything apart from God". I enjoyed listening, but soon I arrived and had to go in.
The funny thing was that as soon as I walked into the house, I became completely self-aware. I was totally conscious of the impression I might or might not be making. I said stupid things - oh, so many stupid things! I stumbled all over my words and felt like an awkward and clumsy fool. I was completely self-absorbed.
Mind you, home group was fantastic. The discussion was great, the people were friendly and very welcoming, and I felt wanted and cared for. But regardless of all this, I still felt out of place. After finally blundering my way out the door, I thought, "Oh goodness! That was awful!" I immediately started to review in my mind all my actions and the things I should have done differently. Then, without really thinking, I broke into song, "All I have needed, thy hand hath provided! Great is thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me." Then, realizing the words I was singing, a sudden relaxation broke over me. I breathed a sigh of relief. Well, if they all liked me, that was fine! And if they didn't, so what? My identity lies in Christ, and in Him rests my security. I watched happily as my idol of acceptance toppled and broke into fine dust. I was no longer self-absorbed, but simply resting in One who is better. The rest of the evening was lovely. I drove home, then Isaac, Kendra and I all talked about the Gospel for two straight hours. It was a good way to end the day.
Hadi and I made a great connection during my last couple weeks there. We played cards for a long time one evening, and that seemed to do it. She especially liked the 52 Card Pick Up. For those of you who aren't aware, this simply involves letting the cards fly at Hadi until there are all fifty-two of them on the floor to pick up. Hadi and I also made up a joke that she is my mommy. She was a mean mommy - always sticking her tongue out at me if I cried, or running away if I said, "Hold me, mommy!" Anyway, it was great fun. :)
The rest of the week was a blur of good times in the ice and snow of Dallas. There were visits with Garrett (my dear Texan brother and fellow Ravencrest student) and with Tim and Sarah; my good-bye dinner; walks in the icy moonlight with the kids; lots of potato soup; a visit with Kendra's grandma... and I know I'm missing something else. It was a lovely final week in Dallas.
Saying good-bye was hard. I won't talk about it much. Just suffice it to say that I am really grateful for Isaac, Kendra, Tirzah, Joseph and Hadassah and for the roles they played in my life - especially last month. Thank you, dear Vancil family! "I thank God upon my every remembrance of you." (Philippians 1:3)
I spent most the day in a plane on Saturday, February 10th. When I finally arrived in San Jose and saw my mom and dad and Candi, it was a wonderful relief. We drove down to Amy and Nick's and had dinner there, and spent the night at Ann and Darren's house. It was lovely to have a bit of time with my family before taking off again.
Then I flew to Australia with Isaac.
Life is an adventure!!! : D
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