A Picture
A Thousand Words

Life is NOT what I expect.... ever.

Imagine a fresh painting. Vivid. Lots of color. Probably a spring mountain scene with a lake or stream, and sunshine and shady trees and a meadow, and a huge peak looking calmly down on the splashes of color below. This is my life these moments. And I simply must share the incredible beauty that God has seen fit to smear liberally, as an artist with a brush or paint knife, into my life.

What, you may ask, is the color on my canvas? Why do I feel my life is so rich? There are many, many answers to this question. I will share them with all my heart and see if you don't agree.

Bobby
This amazing man brings me such joy, reminds to walk in the victory Christ has given me, challenges me to look beyond my own nose, prays with me and for me, laughs with me, leads me, behaves like a gentleman, shows me Jesus like a true man. This man is the shadow and sunshine and contrast in my painting that gives it such depth.

San Jose
I almost cannot believe I moved to San Jose. I was afraid to, because I thought suffocate and die in the city. Who knows? Maybe I will. But contrary to what I once imagined, the city is not the end of the world. Traffic is horrible, yes. There are too many people, yes. But I can see hills as I drive the highways, and I can have Bible studies with my sister, and earn money because I have a job, and give money because I am earning it. In our imagined painting, San Jose is the detail that makes up many little interesting parts of the picture. A fox peering around a bush, bubbles in the stream, little birds looking for seed on the ground under a pine tree... Perhaps overlooked at first, those details add spatters of color and cheer to the whole piece.

My Kiddos
I don't have kids, but I feel like a mum sometimes now with three car seats in the back of my car and the three kids I nanny. Kaya is two, Jaz is four and Tai is seven. LOTS more blogs to come about these three. They have brought plenty of spice to my life and I can't even say how neat it is to be a part of this family. The experiences I've had with Tai, Jaz and Kaya have given me an even greater appreciation for the families I know and love so much. When I'm with the kids, I call to mind lessons I learned or observed with Snyder, Vancil and Edwards families. I'm so thankful for the chances I had to watch and learn from these wise ones. I am learning loads on my own as well, through trial and failure, and sometimes trial and success! :) Not all days are easy, but the little victories are encouraging and help me to be excited about what God has set before me. In the painting, these three children are the foreground - the tall pine trees blowing in the wind, the stream gurgling across the canvas, the bit of meadow sprinkled generously with sunny yellow and purple blooms.

Jesus
I must say that my life has taken unexpected turns and twists in the painting of this picture. My one constant has been Christ. I am still learning His perfect faithfulness. I found through each change above that I had perfect peace from God to walk in what He brought me. The peace grows, too, as I continue trusting Him for His plan. All is well. He is the mountain, the earth, the strong foundation of the picture that completes all other parts. He is my Stronghold and my Salvation. The picture would be blank and empty without Him - void of majesty and life.

More to Come
I know I've been unfaithful, but there is much more to tell and now that I have a place to live, I have so many stories to share! I'm settled in. I think my blogging will pick up a little bit. :) This is the signature at the bottom right hand corner of my painting.

This is not the picture of my life, but I like it very much and felt I had to share something with you!

New Year's (Not) Resolutions

It is seriously appalling to me how little I blog anymore. I decided I would make it a goal this year to keep up on my blog, but it's difficult, because I also set a goal to keep up on my journal. What I have found is that I am a pretty consistent writer, but only in one medium. If I journal frequently, my blogging plummets, and if I blog, my journal entries dwindle into nothingness. Then when I pick up on my letter-writing, blog and journal entries sort of just disappear until I stop being faithful to friends via snail mail. I aspire to someday be consistent at all three things simultaneously.

Anyway...

I don't like the term "New Year's Resolutions", because it makes me think of people who can't keep commitments to themselves. I don't know why I think of this... But I don't want to be one of those people, so I don't make resolutions for the new year. I set goals instead.

I also set goals on my birthday each year. This is kind of nice, because if I'm not quite on track with the beginning-of-year goals, I can reset them halfway through the year and make them slightly more realistic and attainable. It's important to set some attainable goals, because then at least I can be sure I'll get to check things off in a year.

I usually also set a few goals that are totally ridiculous... just for the heck of it. Even if I don't reach those goals, they are still fun to work at. But enough jabbering. Behold, my goals for 2012.

1. Read through entire Bible.
2. Be learning to constantly love and serve those around me; especially my family or those with whom I live.
3. Complete Bob George study guides - for real.
4. Learn six new piano songs from sheet music.
5. Read two books per month.
6. Journal (and blog) regularly - especially regarding what I learn in God's Word and His work in my life.
7. Write one letter every day
8. Finish levels 2, 3, and 4 in Rosetta Stone German.
9. Complete the 7 Wonders story with Candi.
10. Go on a special trip with Candi (even a day trip).
11. Be trusting God
12. Be honest
13. Be gracious in everything
14. Be learning and make notable progress in NOT INTERRUPTING PEOPLE.
15. Grow more incurably optimistic!
16. Keep in contact with friends.
17. Be learning to live caring only for God's opinion, resting fully and finding my security in my identity in Jesus Christ.
18. Be learning to walk humbly in submission to God, and to consider others more important than myself, not in false humility, but in true love out-poured through belief in Jesus Christ to be who He says He is in my life.
19. Exercise somewhot (yes, whot) regularly.
20. Get a job, more to San Jose, and save up some money.

You'll notice that I say "be learning" instead of "learn". This is due to the influence of Charlie "Tremendous" Jones:


"Did you ever hear these famous last words: 'This is one thing I've learned'? Know what he's learned? Nothing! I remember saying that, and soon afterward I would wind up learning all over again what I thought I had just learned. Now I've almost learned one thing, and that is that the process of learning to live is TREEEMENNNDOUS!"


Well anyway, it's a lot easier to check off a goal that has "be learning" at the beginning than one that starts with "learn".

The "for real" in Goal #3 indicates that I have extended this goal way too many times. Time to finish something.

The rest are pretty self-explanatory. I want to get better at the things I do. I want to finish things. I want to grow this year. I have already failed at writing one letter per day, but that's a goal that I can work on every time I remember it. I knew I would fail to achieve it when I wrote in there, but I wrote it down anyway with the hope that I will be be a much better correspondent by the end of the year.

Oh, and also:

21. Develop some mad cooking skillz.

What are your hopes for this year?